PSA: Upgrading

Fade in to Sarge and Church, ...somewhere
Sarge:
Hi I'm Sarge from the popular webseries, Red vs Blue.
Church:
And I'm one of the other guys.
Sarge:
As futuristic warriors and tech enthusiasts, we're often faced with the challenge of deciding whether to upgrade our gizmos, to the latest versions.
Church:
So today we present a rare point/counterpoint version of Red vs Blue. When should you upgrade your hardware?
Sgt. Sarge - Counterpoint
Sarge:
You'll wanna upgrade as soon as the newest version comes out. Natural Selection tells us that the organism with the best tools, always survives. Take the most dominant predator in history:
Church:
Are you talkin' about Tex?
Sarge:
I'm talking about velociraptors. Stealthy, cunning- and mean as all get out. For years they dominated the Earth, with their awesome hunting skills.
Church:
Frightening.
Sarge:
Indeed. Now imagine one of them with the latest smartphones equipped with Bluetooth technology.
Church:
Ridiculous.
Sarge:
Ridiculous...ly unstoppable.
Sarge's Bulleted List - Dominate Raptor Style
Sarge:
Upgrading to the latest hardware as soon as possible, gives you the edge you need to track and kill your enemies.
Track and Kill w/ ease
Sarge:
And turn their precious flesh, into vital nutrients.
Pvt. L. L. Church - Counter - Counterpoint
Church:
On the other hand, maybe you should consider waiting to upgrade. As you probably know, everyone here in the Halo Universe is about to get a big armor upgrade.
Sarge:
Can't wait.
Church:
Yeah, me neither. But don't forget-
Title Goes Here - Early Adoption Blues
Church:
During the Reach beta, Caboose upgraded his armor to the invisibility version, and now that the beta is over, he can't turn it off.
Hey check it out, Caboose is right there, but invisible. And sounding like someone killed his cat
Caboose:
Hello. Nice to see everyone, I wish everyone could see me.
Sarge:
Oh he's invisible! I kept hearing his voice and thought I was just going crazy.
Caboose:
Sigh.
Church:
Don't worry Caboose, once the game comes out, I'm sure there will be a way to shut it off.
Caboose:
Ah, good. I need sleep.
Sarge:
Sleep? When that game comes out, I won't sleep for a week!
Church:
Yeah, no it's not that it's just that he's having trouble sleeping because he can see through his eyelids now.
Sarge:
Oh. ...That's creepy.
Church:
I'm positive they'll fix it with a patch though, er- something. Right Caboose? Caboose? Where'd you go?
Caboose:
I'm over here.
Church:
God dammit, we need to put a bell on you man.
Sarge:
A plain ol' bell, no way! Get the latest bell. It has wireless speakers and eighteen different bell tones. Plus every time it rings, an Angel gets an eagle greeter.
Church:
No way, I'm not gonna upgrade his bell now. You know there's just gonna be a better version of one next year.
Caboose:
Oh, you're not upgrading?
Church:
Not me man, no way.
Caboose:
Because I was gonna tell you that they make that chat pad for your controller in black now.
Church:
Well... I need to have that.
Sarge:
Heh- sure you do buddy.
Church:
Really, it's a necessity.
Sarge:
Hheheheh. If you say so.
 

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Comments (1-1 of 1)
#1: fredbob said at 2011-01-17 2:12AM:

Cant wait

I cant wait for the RvB Reach series.

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