Episode 3: Follow the Leader

Fade in to a junkyard in space
U.N.S.C. Scrap Metal Recycling Station / Many Years Ago...
Cut to the guards in the room C.T. was going into
Guard:
Intruder! Get him!
They fire, but the C.T. they hit is a hologram
The Leader:
Stand down.
The real C.T. enters and kicks the Guards' asses, then takes aim at the Captain
C.T.:
You didn't wait for me to start? I'm hurt.
She tosses the gun to him
The Leader:
I was worried about you. Didn't think you'd be able to get away.
C.T.:
You don't know the half of it. They stepped up production. Here.
She hands him something resembling an iPad
C.T.:
This ship was captured by the enemy. I'm surprised there's anything left in the data banks.
The Leader:
Heh! Not everyone follows protocol. You should know that better than anyone.
C.T.:
You really think they found another artifact? How could nobody have discovered that when they were processing the wreckage?
The Leader:
They didn't know where to look. And they didn't have what you have.
Guard:
Sir, we are in position. Awaiting your signal.
U.N.S.C. Archives / Present Day
Carolina is behind cover, trading fire with someone
Carolina:
Wash, take that right side.
Washington:
Where's eveyrone else!?
Carolina:
Working on an extraction plan. They should be here right about-
The Warthog flies through the air playing its usual Mexican music, and crushes two guards against some cement
Grif:
Wooohoo!
Carolina:
-now.
Grif:
Sup?
Sarge:
Damn you Private Grif! You took out those two soldiers before I could administer my lethal brand of Red justice! Now where's Simmons?
Grif:
I don't know. He fould another Warthog and he was right behind me.
Simmons and Tucker roll up slowly, their Warthog playing "Los Dos Laredos/Acordeones" by Jaime y Los Chamacos
Simmons:
Present.
Grif:
Wow. Nice entrance dude. Very thrilling.
Simmons:
Hey I don't need all that flash. Some of us have respect for the fundamentals.
Grif:
Hey, what did I tell you before? You know you're not allowed to use words that have the term 'fun' in them.
Tucker:
I'm riding with you next time. He actually stopped at the train tracks.
Simmons:
That's the law!
Tucker:
We were under fire!
Simmons:
It's still the law.
Sarge:
Simmons, only you could manage to make a high speed chase boring.
Simmons:
Thank you Sir.
Grif:
What is that song?
Simmons turns off the radio
Simmons:
Uh, it's a Bolivian orchestral mash-up? Obviously you haven't heard of them yet?
Grif:
Thank God for that.
Church:
I still don't understand, why did you guys rescue me?
Sarge:
Don't blame us, blame Mrs. Fuzzy Britches.
Caboose:
Yeah, uh, actually it's Ms Fuzzy Britches. She gets really mad when you say it wrong.
Sarge:
She wanted to get you outta that memory whatsit. Something about you being the geneticafied and mental imprintchamacallit of that Professor What's His Puss.
Church:
Could someone translate that, I don't speak Huckleberry.
Caboose:
Yeah the mean lady wants to find the Director and since you have all his memories you might know where he went.
Church:
Wow, that actually seemed, too correct, for you Caboose. There must have been some part of that that you didn't underst-
Caboose:
And when we find him we're going to throw him a very big surprise party.
Church:
Ah, there we go.
Sarge:
Sure, as long as 'surprise party' means shooting him in the face and then walking away in slow motion, heh heh.
Caboose:
Surprise!
Church:
Well ah- you know I hate to break it to you but I don't know how much help I'm gonna be, I mean- I may have have the Director's memories, but that doesn't mean I ...remember, them.
Caboose:
Yeah, I have the same problem, I barely remember any of my own memories. And none of anyone else's.
Sarge:
Well you'd better start rememberin', Blue. I had to watch Grif nearly die three times today. It's like fate was laughin' at me. Why don't you just take him already!?
Church:
I gotta say: I'm pretty surprised to see you taking orders from a Blue, Sarge.
Sarge:
Huh. Under duress.
Church:
Wh-hat, you didn't wanna come?
Sarge:
Let's just say you seem to know a lot of women with quick tempers. You got a fetish or somethin'?
Church:
I guess you could- say, yeah apparently.
Sarge:
... Wanna talk about it?
Church:
... No.
Caboose:
...Wanna talk about it with y-
Church:
No.
Carolina:
Okay, everyone load up. Nav links are in your HUDs, alternate navs uploaded to your secondary objectives. Sync?
Everyone:
...
Carolina:
Sync?
Washington:
Oh, uh right. Everyone, just say 'sync' whenever she says that.
Tucker:
Oh. Sync?
Caboose:
Refrigerator.
Carolina:
You guys not used to getting orders?
Grif:
Oh we're used to getting 'em all right. We just aren't used to doing much with 'em.
Carolina:
We're retreating.
Simmons:
Oh, okay yeah. That's usually step one in most of our plans. Sync.
Caboose:
Easy Bake Oven.
Carolina:
Let's just go.
Cut to the hangar in the scrap yard ship
Carolina:
What do you mean, the Leader's not here?
South:
Exactly what I said, his last check-in is upstairs in the main deck, but his call sign just appeared in their internal frequencies. He's broadcasting from out in Bone Valley.
Carolina:
Meaning he's not here.
South:
Gee, you're starting to sound like a broken record.
Carolina:
Fine. Change of plans everyone, we're heading into the junkyard. It's beginning to feel more and more like a setup.
North and Wash join them, and then York flies screaming in through the hangar doors and crashes next to them
York:
Uh! Hyou would not believe the time I had getting back. It's nuts out there.
Carolina:
Let's go people!
Carolina and South depart via jetpack
York:
What, no welcome back?
North:
Alright, welcome back.
North exits stage jetpack
York:
Where are they off to in such a hurry?
Washington:
Found the Leader. He's hiding out in Bone Valley.
York:
We're going all the way over there? After what happened to Georgia?
Washington:
Would someone please tell me what happened to Georgia?
York:
Dude, you do not wanna know.
Jetpack York
Washington:
I really do though!
Cut to C.T. and the Guard Captain
The Leader:
Time to get outta here.
The other guards walk off, but C.T. stays put
The Leader:
You too.
C.T.:
I can't, not yet.
The Leader:
If they weren't onto you before, they definitely will be now. Come with us Connie. I'm not gonna lose you over this.
Guard:
All forces we are good, I repeat: we are good.
 

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