Episode 4: Turbulence

Fade in to the windmill
Wind Power Facility / Present Day
The vehicles roll up and stop
Carolina:
What's going on? Why are we stopping?
Grif:
We've been driving for hours.
Carolina:
And, we've got a lot more ground to cover. So let's keep moving.
Grif:
Listen lady, I know this is your first road trip with us, but we've got a system. And that system includes snack breaks, bathroom breaks, and, stopping to take pictures of funny road signs.
Carolina:
That's ridiculous.
Grif:
Not as ridiculous as Bonner Street.
Simmons:
H-ah, so close dude. So close.
Grif:
It's out there Simmons, we just have to have faith that we'll find it.
Washington:
I should probably go stop her from killing your friend.
Caboose:
Um, Tucker I just noticed something? Something really bad.
Tucker:
Yeah, me too dude. I think our guy to girl ratio, peaked like five years ago.
Caboose:
Uh no no Tucker, um... yeah we, we forgot to bring Church.
Tucker:
Wait, did you just now realize that Church isn't here?
Caboose:
He's not gonna be pleased about this one.
Tucker:
Calm down moron, we didn't leave him behind.
Caboose:
Uh, yes but you see, I am not seeing him, so... where is he?
A ghostly Church appears over Tucker's left shoulder, groaning exasperatedly
Church:
You don't wanna know.
Caboose:
Church! You- you're so small. ...I would like to feed you a small cracker.
Tucker:
How do you like the new place, Tinkerbell?
Church:
You mean your disgusting storage unit?
Tucker:
What? How is my storage unit 'disgusting?'
Church:
Well, for starters, I had to delete fifty gigs worth of crap just so I could fit in this thing.
Tucker:
Whohohoa hang on a second dude; you didn't delete my- uh, 'home movies' folder did you?
Church:
And that brings me to my second point.
Cut to Carolina and Wash overlooking them from a catwalk
Carolina:
What a bunch of worthless idiots.
Washington:
Yeah, they're idiots, but, they're not that bad. Once you get to know 'em.
Carolina:
Hm.
Washington:
You know, we almost managed to trap the Meta the last time we were here.
Carolina:
But you didn't.
Carolina starts walking away
Washington:
No. I guess not.
Cut to the scrapyard
U.N.S.C. Scrap Metal Recycling Station / Many Years Ago...
The freelancers are flying through space on fucking jetpacks
Carolina:
I don't get it. Everything's stopped.
North:
Maybe they're retreating.
York:
Nothing left out here but a bunch of junk.
More flying, then cut to the pilot
Pilot:
This is four seven niner. I've lost visual on targets it's, like they all just, left.
Cut to the bridge of the Mother of Invention
Counsellor:
Sir, their outpost is disabled. And it looks as if we have driven off the remaining fighters.
Director:
Wehll, good riddance to bad rubbish Counsellor.
Counsellor:
Indeed Sir. All enemy systems appear to be offline. Wait...
Director:
What is it?
The Staff of Charon, which looks just like the Mother of Invention only the name is different, emerges from its concealed position among the scrap
Pilot:
It's a trap, they're hiding in the junkyard repeat, it's a trap!
Director:
Evasive maneuvers!
Cut to the bridge of the Staff of Charon
The Leader:
Fire.
The Staff of Charon fires on the Mother of Invention and does a bunch of damage
Director:
Son of a bi-!
Space combat
Director:
No!
The Staff of Charon drops off a mine
Guard:
We're away Sir, new course laid in. Are you sure you don't wanna stay and finish this?
The Leader:
Heh. I left our guests a present.
The Staff of Charon vamooses, and 479er detects a nuclear device
Pilot:
Guys, get out of there, they've outfitted that piece of junk with nukes!
Director:
Fall back, Counsellor.
Counsellor:
Falling back, Director.
The Mother of Invention turns around very quickly for a ship that size, and the Freelancers start moving faster
Carolina:
Go, go, go!
Pilot:
Get inside, now!
The rear hatch of the dropship opens, and everyone enters except Wash
York:
Wash, what're you doing? Get in here, use your jetpack.
Washington:
I-I don't wanna end up like Georgia!
Carolina:
Oh, for God's sake.
She fires a grappling hook at his codpiece, and pulls him in
Washington:
Huh? Whaaa!
A piece of debris hits the device, which detonates in a fancy show of light, just behind the dropship
Pilot:
Everyone okay back there?
York:
Never better! Thanks for asking!
Director:
What the Hell just happened, people? Tell me you accomplished your mission!
Carolina:
Negative Sir, their leader escaped.
York:
Well, looks like the enemy lives to fight another day.
South:
Again.
Director:
That is most unfortunate. Are all Agents accounted for?
Carolina:
All except C.T. Sir. She's gone.
Director:
Define 'gone,' Agent.
 

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